Day 64: Dying Dark

You know what they say…Blondes have more fun, and and all that. Well, given that I’m rather proud that I’m not one to have too much fun, I decided there was only one way to go, hair-hue wise: Dark. My natural hair is best described as the color of diluted puke. You know, the brownish-orangey […]

Day 59: Running on Empty

I’ve always secretly wanted tempt fate in this way…that is, as long as someone else was with me to walk to the nearest gas station. Anyway, running on empty wasn’t intentional. A friend and I were driving in the middle of nowhere, lack of cell phone reception, and mile after mile stretching before us without […]

Day 54: Writing a Fiction Amuse-bouche

Elton John. Sir. Past his prime; curdled milk.  Bloated, sweaty, warbling. Has been? Never been, as far as I’m concerned.  S*Q*U*A*R*E. Tiny Dancer is a cheese grater on my gray matter. A friend knows this well and upon entering his apartment he rarely fails to cue Reginald Kenneth Dwight. (Yes, Sir Elton’s real name is […]

Day 51: Dining Al Burlesque

Ok, this is definitely an unexpected first: Thanks to my husband, who made the plans “for me,” tonight I experienced my first dinner-and-burlesque show. Dancers can-canned and careened to the likes of 1970s hits like “Lady Marmalade.” They shimmied, strutted and sashayed to Big Band era songs. Pranced, pirouetted and pole-danced to…heck, I can’t even […]

Day 44: Sending a Message to James Franco

This is a two-fer: (1) I followed the advice of readers who commented; and (2) I sent James Franco a message with links to my website. And guess what? He. Did. Not. Respond. What the…??? Shocking, I know. Downright scandalous! But..I can’t believe James would ignore me like that. It’s just not possible. Personally, I […]

Day 43: Signing Up for an Acting Workshop

I’m bitter. You may recall how I submitted an application to be an extra.  All I got back was a bogus email that was sent to thousands of other wannabes. Did I mention that I’m bitter? I just don’t understand why I haven’t been discovered. I mean, isn’t there always a need for the less […]

Day 8: Entering Travel Sweepstakes

In hopes that excitement finds me (note to Universe: Here I am! Find me!), today I’m trying the following new activity:  entering online travel sweepstakes. I never do this sort of thing because of a paralyzing fear of SPAM that rivals that of my fetal-position-rocking-back-and-forth terror of Charlie McCarthy ventriloquism dolls. Naturally, I assume entering […]